alphabet challenge - j

[felicitygs]

 J - Yet to be known

 

“I don’t know, okay?!”

 

“Then find out,” he snarled, shoving Gavyn.

 

“Lucas, calm down, hey,” and Anton’s hand on his arm, pulling him away, while Terrence tried to calm Gavyn. Lucas glared at Gavyn, then yanked his arm away from Anton. He could hear Terrence trying to soothe Gavyn’s hurt feelings–of course–and pushed it out of his thoughts. He had better things to focus on.

 

“Lucas, talk to me,” Anton said. “Come on, you know not all of us can just magic information–”

 

“Is that all it is to you?” he snarled, turning on Anton. Anton stopped short, blinking at him. “Just plucking information out of the air without any struggle, nothing to it–”

 

“That’s not what I meant–”

 

“It’s exactly what you meant,” Lucas said, pointing at Anton, “and even if it’s not what you meant, it’s what the rest of you think. ‘Why doesn’t he just figure it out himself, why have us look, why–’”

 

“Lucas, calm–”

 

“–’why do we even bring him at all if he can’t be useful,’ oh, I realize, I’m not stupid, nevermind that finding something like that is small, the matter of a few lengths of thread, would take longer to find through the Weave than ever it would take elsewise, before even considering the damage. But no one ever thinks of that, no, with your lack of cloth and understanding and I hate–”

 

“Lucas,” Anton said, grabbing hold of Lucas’ arms.

 

Lucas stopped talking, mouth clicking shut, and stared at Anton. His breath was unsteady, ragged, and he shook a little under the touch.

 

“Lucas,” Anton repeated, gentler, “it’s okay that you don’t know. Really. No one’s thinking that. Stop beating yourself up.”

 

“Gavyn is,” Lucas said dully, feeling exhausted.

 

“Who cares what Gavyn thinks? He’s a birdbrain anyway.” Anton rubbed his hands along Lucas’ biceps, a soothing gesture, and Lucas closed his eyes for a moment to ground on the sensation. “We’ll figure it out. We’ve figured everything else out so far. I know how it is, and if you keep going, you’ll just make yourself feel worse and worse right before you do something stupid. So it’s alright. Really.”

 

“I want to help,” Lucas said quietly, eyes still closed.

 

“We all do.”